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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in elahadrun's LiveJournal:

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Saturday, January 19th, 2008
11:43 pm
OH

MY

GOD

I miss Star Trek.

I mean, seriously, I'll be much better when LOST returns a week from Thursday, and it's not that I don't get excited about Heroes. I mean, even for television, there's American Gladiators and Ugly Betty. That's more than enough TV for anti-TV me.

But GODDAMN. Could I get some socialist space fantasy where people pretend to be Robin Hood and Flash Gordon BACK ON THE AIR?!?!

I gotta buy some DVDs or some shit.
Wednesday, June 6th, 2007
10:54 am
YOU THREW OUT MY BAG OF NOODLES
Well, that was a nice weekend. Great to see everyone--you know, I don't think I'd seen Pat since HE GRADUATED. So that was a little mini fifth reunion. It was a weekend of hilarious Dads (Kacey, Clancy, and Josh all have hilarious dads that we hung out with). It was a weekend of a Great Deal of alcohol. Man, we didn't even know we still COULD drink that much.

I will tell you what: I am glad to add Ohio to my list of visited states, I am glad to take a road trip, too. But I am not going to spend another day driving for a while. We borked our plan coming home and spent the night in Rochester instead. You know what that means? That means that out of the last 28 days, I spent seven of them driving at least four hours, and usually more. That's right. A whole week spent on the road. (It was somewhere from 45-50 hours across those days). Yow! No wonder the thought of getting in the car reviles me. It's not like I'm a sports team or anything, but it's a good thing I heart the highway.

Even before we started drinking, Kacey and Clancy were mind-numbingly adorable and beautiful. Yay!

What else have I got to say? It is disingenuous to moan about job-hunting, as I am obviously posting on lj and not, for instance, writing cover letters.

Anna's right; there's something lonely about coming back home. Even though we see each other one way or the other at various things like this, it is tragic that we aren't a "knock three times on the ceiling" away from each other anymore. God Bless The Internet, of course, for providing us ways of being in touch. Maybe in a few more years we'll all be able to just turn on our monitors and see everyone. But there's no substitute for hugging, poking, pelting, and stealing-from in the context of, you know, old-fashioned physical reality.

God, Rovere, I missed you.
Saturday, December 9th, 2006
2:17 pm
Josh knew what to do to drag me out of my pity party--one beer, four hours of babylon 5 and a 10 pm visit to Starbucks was pretty much what it took.

We finally put the bed together today--let it be known that it is kind of a pain in the ass to put an Aneboda Ikea bed together, and probably a lot of their other beds. I'm not sure if three people would help, maybe it would. It was just kind of generally unwieldy. Naturally, it is easier to put together something that you can move singlehandedly.

I'm hoping that the bed frame (and consequential under-the-bed storage) will be the final kick-in-the-ass for the bedroom. We have done a great job getting rid of clothes we don't use (although I discovered more lurking today) and that means that laundry is way more efficient. Also, Josh is the laundry hero, and THAT makes laundry way more efficient.

So I think we are in good shape to get that room DONE. The kitchen needs reorganization (hurrah new shelving); other than that it is DONE. The living room is a mess. It doesn't have bed parts in it anymore, but it has the clean laundry, some furniture that doesn't go here, the Christmas tree undecorated because the stand is bad. Also it is standing on some dingy towels so as not to scratch the floor, and that kind of makes it look unwanted.

So I guess the living room is next, although I should be focusing on the bedroom is now. Right?

It's so weird, but I've never Moved In like this. I've certainly never gone out and bought furniture (or carried a freecycle mattress half a mile). I hauled my ebay futon up into Henrietta St, I bought four plastic place settings and a bike, and called myself done. Everyone knows Linden St was a mess, and given my late arrival and the lack of general systems in Hadley, I just never really got around to unpacking most of my shit.

I think part of it was my family--my mom is enthusiastic about our apartment now, whereas before she was always visibly uncomfortable standing in just the doorway of the house in Hadley, and in two years, no one from my family was allowed to visit me in Rochester, lest they catch sin, I guess. I guess I had probably internalized that shame a lot more than I realized, and so the convenient fact that getting hitched fixed that (because it was certainly no guarantee) has had real benefit in terms of me taking care of my living space.

Yay! We have a bed! I am so pleased we aren't sleeping on the floor anymore! Now Josh and I won't get stuffed up from the dust on the floor!

I appear to be mildly allergic to some stuff. I get consistently stuffy at work, and I was getting stuffy sleeping on the floor. My dad has some general-airborne allergies like that, and trouble with pollen.

Do you want to know the worst thing I inherited from my parents? It's from my DAD that I'm allergic to deodorant! I only just found this out!! So HE'S why my armpits change color and itch from 97% of all deodorants!! And that would be just unfortunate if it weren't that MY MOTHER SWEATS EQUALS ONE MILLION. WTF why did they breed. So now I am stinky unless I apply my weak-ass hypoallergenic hippie deodorant at least twice a day.

That isn't quite a story worthy of 'another episode,' but the crazy Carmody stories have been sparse lately, so I'll offer what I can.

Final Fantasy XII is shockingly low on plot, and particularly character development. I'm not really sure how that came to be. Certainly a lot of it is because Matsuno was used to tactical RPGs, but the few cutscenes are generally just "the political plot incrementally advances" or "one joke is made." The other thing that's weird--remember all those catchphrases from X and X-2? "Let's finish this." "Gullwing repair service!" The combat is very pretty, but notably silent. The only time the characters talk is when they die, usually just "no...." or "I can't...." Do they maybe thank each other for phoenix downs? That may be.

Anyway it's kind of weird, because I got 60 hours in and realized I was still kind of waiting for the story to begin. Then I realized I was about three dungeons from the end of the game (not counting side stuff of course). Then a very transparent ad for the game guide made me angry, and I put it on time out for a while. Josh started playing his file, and I'm ashamed that I might pick mine up again while he's out buying a decent tree stand (hopefully). I was playing HM:DS but then I lost five whole days to a freeze (I was certain I had saved, guess not) and it can be disheartening to have to plant your sweet potatoes ALL OVER AGAIN when you were THIS CLOSE to your chicken coop getting installed.

I am SO CLOSE to having chickens. HM:DS isn't easy.

I guess I'm done ramblin at YOLL. Maybe I will go wash dishes so I will feel better about playing videogames later. Sounds fair.
Friday, December 8th, 2006
11:26 pm
I am going to sleep soooooooooo late tomorrow. And then when I get up, I am going to TAKE A NAP. And then I will take a shower, and then ANOTHER NAP.

Then I will make fried rice.

Then I will go back to sleep FOR THE NIGHT.

This is probably not realistic, but nobody is perfect.

EYES ON THE PRIZE
Thursday, December 7th, 2006
1:30 pm
It's like it was a full moon, but it was a full moon all week, every day. Gah!

Ok actually nothing weird happened yesterday, yesterday was just very very busy, and that's not really a full moon kind of thing.

But otherwise it has been kind of loopy. LOOPY. LOOP LOOP.
Monday, December 4th, 2006
8:45 am
Happy
It's snowing!
Sunday, December 3rd, 2006
6:55 pm
Mithra is the reason for the season!
Sooo, when going over our dollars with Josh in an effort to develop a present-buying budget, I realized, wait a second, we are totally financially secure. (Obviously, if Josh were to be out of work for more than, say, three months, we will have a new situation, but he's got a month of work LEFT and we don't think it'll take that long, as much as it sucks to look). sooooooooo, I spent a lot of money on Christmas stuff. I mean, not a LOT of money, but more than like, you pay in one month for your electric bill.

I guess I got a little bit overzealous because I started thinking about buying ornaments and cookie cutters that I will decorate and bake with with future-babies? We were going around Ten Thousand Villages and I was saying to Josh, "I can't wait until I have a baby so I can indoctrinate them" and he is all "honey, I don't think the tree we just got is as big as you think it is."

Well, maybe that's my retail therapy for the year? It's funny how often I start to second-guess myself when I buy stuff. But really, nothing I bought is a disposable purchase (or even breakable, really), and all of it is very nice. Oh, except for the $6.00 tree stand. We accidentally left the old tree stand at the Hadley House garage, and I was like "oh poo." Josh says, "no, those are really cheap. see? six bucks." I thought maybe that was awful cheap, but hey, my assumptions of a $45 piece of equipment were clearly inaccurate. Ultimately, $6 is too cheap. The holes and the screws and so forth don't really line up accurately. Also, paying that little probably means that the person operating the factory equipment just gets shot if they ask for a raise.

The tree is bigger than I thought it was at the tree-place. But as trees go it is still a small one.

It will be hard to beat our little tree with cranberries and popcorn in Rochester, that thing was uber cute and very delicious-looking. But I am pretty excited for our uber hippie international fair trade crafts tree this year.

Also, I figured out where to get colored candles, since NO ONE in this area has even HEARD of an advent wreath: The pagan store! The little leaflet congratulates me on my selection of qualities and energies pertaining to the fourth and seventh chakras.

I could write a little about how I love the pagan store and how it's funny because I am kind of afraid of/occasionally put off by pagans a lot of the time, but the store owners are such great people (SO GREAT), but that will take more words than I am going to write right now (because of how so hungry I am).

But a Christmasy (and capitalisty) kind of day put me in a good mood so far. I hope you are all having fun getting ready for Xmas/Hannukah/Wicca Solstice/Humanist Solstice/Steal-From-The-Santa-Pot-Day or what have you. I hope your compulsory office celebrations are not smarmy or offensive.

Also, New Year's is soon, and then after that I'll be twenty-five soon! Seems like a good opportunity to get depressed, but at least people are FINALLY going to go try the Tibetan restaurant with me! Hurrah!
Saturday, December 2nd, 2006
12:23 am
Evan and Zach, I miss you a lot.

I'm thinking a lot about friends these days.

I'm getting older, and I don't know if it's really time for that yet.
Friday, December 1st, 2006
9:15 am
DUDE

DUDE DUDE DUDE DUDE

This new movie The Nativity Story is supposed to be totally terrible but ALEXANDER SIDDIG is playing THE ANGEL GABRIEL

DUDE
8:57 am
Cheers to Pope Benedict, who, near as I can tell, did the right thing.

Way to show me up, dude! I am SO PLEASED to be wrong about you this time. Keep it real!

Jeers to Homeland Security (big surprise). They have assigned air travelers secret risk levels, and track basically everything you do, including the meal you order. So they can prosecute vegans? So they can track who's ordering Hallal, I gotta assume. Does that tick your "terror rating" up by 3 points on the scale of 500?

While I appreciate that there is probably some level of classified information that can be helpful in keeping people safe, I don't think having an invisible terror rating assigned to you that you can never know or dispute is particularly...American. And I wonder if Homeland Security has any understanding that bureaucracy can be a hindrance. It's not possible to prove how effectively the systems are working and which systems are not, unless they're not working in such a bad way that there are explosions. But it seems to me that creating this massive database of who ate what for lunch encourages a needle-in-a-haystack mentality that is totally counter-productive, and hardly counter-terrorist.

A Confession. Ok, I will cop to it. I am a little bit sad. Because I always wanted to be roommates with Jen? so I am a little bit sad. What I really want is for everybody to be safe and happy and in a good place to grow, but it's easy to want that to happen MY way, you know? I am just going to come clean and say I am a little sad, because then maybe I will get over myself :)
Thursday, November 30th, 2006
11:19 am
monocolor white weenie
I miss racial diversity!

Dammit, these days, whenever I see black people I do this bullshit white guilt thing. I much preferred the old workplace (not Abundance of course, but Family Resource Center) where I had to face up to my reactions of sometimes being the only white person in a group, and learn new ways of laughing about stuff.

I was raised pretty white-bread (although we were eating All-Natural Multigrain). I think maybe even my teachers were so scared of race they didn't want to teach the Civil War--I remember spending ages on Pilgrims, the Revolutionary War, Medieval Europe or general modern Geography. I was in fifth grade or even middle school, I think, before I realized that the historical story I had crafted for myself out of television, school, and my mother's reaction to people on the T in particular, was false. I thought for years and years that the Civil War had been fought between white people and black people (who were from The South, of course), and that Black people hated White people because we had won.

Oof!

Being in Western Mass doesn't challenge me on race. At least when I was teaching, I could contribute to the extent that allowing the black kid to participate as an equal student is not something most of the teachers at my old school district really knew how (cared how) to do. There's one black family on the top floor of my building, they run something called The Harriet Project, which has been difficult to track down, but appears to be some sort of networking thing for people of color. While trying to figure out more about it, I came across a good essay on the racism of our "happy valley," you can read it here. The Men's Resource Center is pretty much extremely awesome. I recommend any of the editorials.

I guess I should get more involved. It was so much easier to get connected in Rochester, because I was just exploiting all of Josh's connections for my own ends. Also, it's easier to get involved when you already know the people personally, because then you get to set the pace of your commitment--I tend to overcommit with disastrous results, and when someone knows me as "that girl Linda's boy is dating" or "the cashier at the co-op who wears all the skirts" or "my co-worker," it's easier to go to one protest without being necessarily drafted into the next. It's easy to get drained. That's why there are so many cranky fucking ex-hippies out there...

Anyway, I miss being challenged in that way, and I really want to be less racist, and Eastworks is not really diverse. I think that if I were to spend some of my free time doing something more meaningful (I wish Eastworks was as busy as I first believed it was), then I would be less tired for the rest of that free time. I'm atrophying, like. And getting encouraged in the bad politics where voting Democrat and supporting gay marriage is "enough."

Maybe I will call the dude at the Men's Resource Center. He knows The Boss. Maybe that's enough of a personal connection for me to feel comfortable asking how I can be of use.

(I could ask The Harriet Project, but I work for their landlord, so I don't know that that would be a great idea.)

I miss my kids! I hope they're in good shape. My twos are in kindergarten this year! Sniffl.
8:00 am
It's totally strange that CNN is running features from The Onion these days, isn't it? Does anyone understand the causality here?
Wednesday, November 29th, 2006
11:22 am
Patience, patience, patience.

rrr.

IMPATIENCE

rr, I meant more patience.

r.
10:28 am
Catie? Tato? Hototato?
Guys, Greg the Yellow Wiggle is sick.

:(

My old pre-k-er's are going to be so upset!

:(
8:36 am
I gotta go to bed earlier. :(

At least I have things to do at work today. Which is not to say that the Wigu backlog isn't totally awesome.

LATER: Oh, there's an article up on the Unabomber. Oh, Ms. Devlin. You crazy fucking weirdo.
Tuesday, November 28th, 2006
1:04 pm
So this new chapstick I got that is Lemon Ginger from Badger is really awesome.

But not as awesome as BRADEN LAMB!

BRADEN LAMB WHOOOOOOO

BRADEN LAMB IS OLDER TODAY
Monday, November 27th, 2006
3:17 pm
I've been funnelling and funnelling money into my credit card to try to pay it down. I was making minimum payments when I wasn't really working, but I made a lot of $200 payments, too.

I'm still hovering with $89 available credit.

This craziness has got to end. Don't charge your groceries, kids.

EDIT: of course it is salient to note that I have charged maybe $100 worth of "I forgot my lunch"-type purchases THIS CALENDAR YEAR. Effin interest.
12:43 pm
I like these long-ass bathrobe-type sweaters that are in now. I got this one cardigan the other day, but I want some bathrobes. All the office ladies on my floor are swishin around in them. They seem pretty pricey, but I bet I can find something if I sniff around enough.

Sniffing for the smell of sweaters.

OH I WILL USE MY WEIRDO/SWEATER ICON FOR THIS POST
Saturday, November 25th, 2006
11:45 am
Josh made me some new icons
We celebrated Buy-Nothing day by going through the bags of clothes we still hadn't unpacked. Today I think we'll need to go through the actual bedroom, because sometimes Josh comes home from the laundry with mysterious laundry stowaways that don't fit us. I don't mean that they're other people's laundry, they're just things we wouldn't have gone to the trouble of washing if we had paid closer attention.

We broke B-N Day by going to the diner at night; that was good, because otherwise Buy-Nothing Day would also have been Never-Leave-The-House Day. I used to think that Adbuster's efforts to organize "alternative events" was an awareness-raising kind of thing, now I see that it's an important exercise in doing something with your day that involves leaving the house, but doesn't involve a transfer of funds.

When I'm a great honkin matriarch, it will just mean Giant Bake-Off Day, which I understand is another pretty common traditional use of the Friday after Thanksgiving. Josh and I had a plan to make Apple-Pumpkin Butter this weekend, I think we're still on track. I wouldn't cry if we went to see Casino Royale instead.

I don't really have anything else to make a coherent thought out of. But I wanted to say hi. Hi!

(BTW: the icon is Flora from Harvest Moon. She's a archaelogist. Sexy woman of science.)
12:23 am
Yo if you are looking for that old entry, I friends-onlied it for professional reasons. Whoops, shouldn't talk about what I'm getting paid out on the internets.
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